And here my work begins ...

Rainbow’s Beginning

Everyone knows where the rainbow ends, and what’s typically at the end: a pot of gold.  Maybe that’s metaphorical of our own personal searches, meaning we’re all looking for something to show our success and something tangible in all our work.

I have to go back to the beginning.

I called my other blog, “The Depravity Rainbow”, because I wanted all my feelings, my perversions, my sicknesses, to come out, to be the varied colors of the rainbow, and to show you everything bright about my inner darkness.  And what’s been coming out has not just been some of my desires and delights, but also my deepest human fears, joys and a little more honesty than I’ve been comfortable with in the last few years.  I’ve spilled my guts about who I love, why I love them, and what that’s done to me and how I am coping with it all trying to be more than what’s given in my life currently.  All that is out there, and I can’t take it back, nor would I want to, as it has shown me (in people reading my experiences and feelings) that I am not alone, nor unsupported.

People say, “Be a teacher”, “be happy drawing for kids”, and limit me, or wanting me to choose to limit myself.  And no, I don’t mean here on-line, but in my real life, my vanilla life, where I live within the rules of what others know about me, not what I’ve hidden for so very long.  Nothing could be further from the truth, and I am working to rediscover those things I used to love about myself.

I count my blessings as well as my self-inflicted wounds.

Now I'm creating blessings and wounds, scarring the world in one way or another.

I asked and mentioned art in previous blogs, and I have been in love with it for as long as I can remember.  Drawing, painting, coloring, cutting, crushing, tracing, doing, designing, helping and directing.  And I turned 43 last year, now accepting that there’s no more time left.  I have no children, no lineage, and I fear leaving no legacy to the world.  So what will this mean?  It means I have to express it ALL, no matter how ugly, how horrid, and let it hang out for the world.

Some things in my fiction could be perceived as evil or disgusting but that’s gonna be a chance I’ll take now.  I am also gonna put my photos up here & at deviantart.com awaiting scrutiny, critiques, and hopefully the chance to make more art, maybe even (Hope, hope!) for a profit and if possible, a living.

What are you gonna find here at the Rainbow’s Beginning?

• Fiction
• Poems
• Photos
• Drawings
• Scripts
• Treatments
• Outlines
• Sketches
• Complete work
• Incomplete work
• Caricatures
• Cartoons
• Comics of the most perverted kind (or hopefully some that are actually funny)

I am gonna post a parallel blog, one for art, and one for writing.  My feelings on one side, my art/creations on the other, and I am gonna hope for encouragement and teasing/taunting, maybe making me grow or live up to all my promises.

So that’s what I am doing.

The clock was running out as I worked out what it would take to make these efforts happen.  Actually, it would take more work, more efforts, and less time on-line.

But I’ve gotta find somewhere to make the cuts needed to make my life my dream and vice-versa.  Hopefully something amazing will come of my decision and my thoughts, and maybe I’ll finally express all the insanity and dreams housed in my heart and soul.

Thank you all for listening and coming with me on this wicked journey.

Always,

Afare24get